Thursday, April 11, 2013

Oh, to be Supermom!

As a mom of 5 young children ages 8 and under, wherever I go people stare, stop to talk and think I must be supermom for the fact that I am actually out living my life with 5 little ones in tow all the time. I often think, if they only knew.....

 What a hard time I have with toddlers!
That I love order and a clean home and get frustrated when it isn't so.
 That I can't stand kids running and screaming and being too loud in the house.
 That I have spent over 1(maybe 2)  full years of my life vomiting and feeling absolutely miserable and sorry for myself over the course of these 5 pregnancies.
 That I have spent so much of my life sick and taking care of kids that I will now go to great lengths to avoid germs and virus's to not lose another day to sickness. 
That I sometimes yell at my kids
 That rarely during this season do I go more than 30 minutes from my house because it overwhelms me to be out for too long at one time and to have to pack much stuff.
I panic at the thought of packing my family up for even one night away. 
 That I did not grow up in a large family and this doesn't come natural to me.
That sometimes there are nights I am too tired to cook and give everyone an unbalanced dinner.
 That I sometimes wish for help that I can't afford, a housecleaner!
 I wish that I had a nice yard and have struggled to be content raising children without one.
That I sometimes get tired of homeschooling and the stress of having our kids education on my shoulders
 That at one time I had 3 children under 3 years old, practically no friends and was in tears almost everyday.
That I long for a house with air conditioning!
That I have struggled with depression both during and after my pregnancies
 That I hate being trapped in the house. I love to be outside and with most of the work involved in having a large family indoors, this has been very hard for me!
That my husband went almost 3 years unemployed in his field of work and I know what it is like to chase down utility trucks and beg them not to turn off my utilities.
I have sold things that I didn't want to sell.
I often walk in the flesh and it stinks!
My husband is a construction engineer who often works out of town and puts in long hours causing him not to be available to help as much as I would like.
That when I go too long without a break, I really struggle to catch my breath as a mom.

I say all this to say, that I am not supermom. My life isn't perfect and I would venture to say that very few woman would envy me. I have breakdowns. I cry. I get lonely and feel a lack of support for what I am doing. I sometimes believe the lie that I am inadequate for this task....
     The truth is that I am not called to live an easy life nor do I want to. I don't know how long I have here but I want my life to count for something! This is the life that God has called me to since I was a little girl, to raise a family of warriors for His kingdom and to overcome all the obstacles in my path. I love this quote that I have heard often in our church,"Obstacles are opportunities to see God's goodness, faithfulness and to see God work all things together for Good". I want to encourage all moms out there to see obstacles as opportunitues and don't give up when life gets tough or humiliating by the worlds standards. These trying times are opportunities to see God's grace unfold in our lives. The world has a narrow view of what it means to live life fully, but few are willing to overcome the obstacles and live the life that God has called them to. So now, Go! Don't try to be supermom or make the world think that you are. Just get on the warpath and overcome those obstacles by walking in a real tangible relationship with God, your husband and children and those around you. Someday, before my children are grown, I hope to have a nice yard for us to all enjoy and go on some family vacations, but if I don't, God and and I on a warpath together with my 5 children running behind us, they love Jesus and they love me. That's a full life...
"But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; Matthew 6:20. 

1 comment:

Allison said...

Awesome! You are inspiring, especially in your struggles friend. Love this!